And behold God spoke to Schwartzman late Tuesday evening, right in the middle of Leno’s monologue, saying, 'Make for yourself an ark, for you and for your entire family, for I have found you righteous in your generation.'
'Now?' asked Schwartzman. He had to be kidding. It was 11:50 pm on a week night - Schwartzman had an 8:30 with a client the next morning, a 9:30 breakfast with the head of his department and a shrink appointment with Dr. Herschberg at 11:00 which meant he'd have to catch the 6:00 am to Grand Central at the latest.
'It’s almost midnight.'
'Shh!' spat Mrs. Schwartzman.
Mrs. Schwartzman liked Jay Leno a lot more than she liked God.